My memoir, “Dirt and Tears,” starts where most books end. I had the career that people leave family and countries for. Yet, I resigned from Google Inc. to travel the world. Instead, the world gave me the worst news of my life, pulling me away from my new found loves – trekking and New Zealand. With zero medical background, I unexpectedly became my mom’s caregiver after a stage four cancer diagnosis. 

A year of travelling the woods of the world with my rucksack was slashed to two months. The mourning of my new life was also curtailed, due to the urgent need to figure out how to be a caregiver. Turned out, exactly what I had to walk away from actually prepared me to care for my mom while the cancer spread. Backpacking had trained me to push through long exhausting days, be ready and calm for any emergency, and find energy while eating little food. Most importantly, it taught me how to be a solid team – on this trail together, no matter what.

The book is a trail guide for the caregiving experience. From ambiguous doctors who shy away from a prognosis, to creating meals that don’t taste like a “rusty nail”, to unexpectedly hopping in the shower to help with bathing, I share vulnerable, raw pieces of the last months with my mom. My story offers a unique perspective to a sadly common experience, which nobody is talking about.

Peppered throughout are cheekier sections to allow the reader a break from the emotions and to laugh. A passionate theory that one should not go on a backpacking trip if they not comfortable talking about poop, or a day dream about my physical therapist brought on by romantic deprivation, are a few examples.

My strength is found in my backpacking experience. My hope is lost in a deep dark crevasse of grief. My healing is found in traveling the world. 

With backpacking and travel as bookends of the story, and as consistent threads throughout, the story is less intimidating to all interested readers. It also opens up appeal to those who have fallen in love with New Zealand, lost a loved one and used adventure to heal, or had horrible news completely upend their plans, but still found ways to appreciate the interruption.

With six years of writing experience, my stories have been published by SISU Magazine, GearJunkie, The Dust Magazine, Out There Podcast, and Women on the Road Podcast. Over the last three years, I have developed and maintained my website, DirtandTears.com, and have grown my audience on social media and a bi-weekly newsletter. 

In 2019 and 2017, I attended the Banff Mountain Film and Book Festival, connecting with authors, and other creatives. In 2017 and 2015, I completed the creative writing courses at the Writing Salon, “Writing from the Heart” I and II. In 2016, I was an active participant in my local Toastmasters International Public Speaking Club, where I received first place ribbons, competed in the Humorous Speech Contest, and was told, “you have a unique ability to evoke emotion.” 

When I’m not exploring the trails of the U.S. National Parks, or the cultures of other countries, I reside in the remote town of Kirkwood, in the Sierra Nevada mountain range, near Lake Tahoe, California.

The book is already written. I have worked on it solo for two years, writing, editing, and now gathering feedback from beta readers. It will get in front of the eyes of the people who will benefit from the story most. I promise you that. Right now, I am looking for others that want to help me on this mission.