I am curious who is experiencing increased anxiety and why. My anxiety my concussion was due to the fact that I was still living in employee housing, directly on the mountain where my job was, surrounded by my co-workers and the blatant sign that winter was still happening with the snow stacking to my window of my 2nd floor apartment. It ate me up inside to be completely surrounded by a world that I could not be a part of in any way. I felt personally responsible for my two co-workers on my team picking up my work when they were both already so overworked. I ached inside everytime another two weeks was added to my recovery sentence. I did not expect it and they did not expect it.

In our current situation, because this is a global pandemic, anxiety caused by guilt has not been present in my body. Yes, I no longer have a paid job at the moment. Neither do nearly all of my colleagues, and many others in the state and the country, even the world. I am using this time to work on my writing projects which are all focused around helping others, and I am connected with other artists and creatives that are trying to do the same. Where does your anxiety lie? What is causing your anxiety right now? Are you worried about your parents or grandparents? Do you have a loved one who is immunocompromised? Are you worried that unemployment will not pay your rent? Do you work in the medical field and are therefore flooded with anxiety for your patients, colleagues and your family? Are you a parent, but still working while they are home for school and therefore feeling anxious about balancing your work commitments, caring for and schooling your child? Are you simply missing physical touch and in person interaction? Are you unsure if you should apply for jobs because you are worried they won’t actually hire during this time and your energy could be better spent elsewhere?

Now, that you have contemplated your own anxiety and where it is coming from, I hope simply the recognition and admittance can help you navigate through it. If not, find something that helps you. Daily meditations, daily walks outside, or maybe a daily bubble bath with candles and classical music. Maybe you need to find a legal, experienced teletherapist.

Next, I want you to put yourself in someone else’s house slippers. Everyone is struggling during this unique time. Some you can relate to, and some you cannot, but we all have one thing in common – we are facing challenges. Do you live alone and therefore you are feeling more lonely, wishing you had a family to spend time with while quarantined? Well, the people who have kids and a partner are spending 24/7 with these people and do not get a moment of “me time.” They would love just one moment of alone time. Are you still employed, trying to figure out how to set up a home office in your tiny apartment with janky internet and a trepidation for technology, plus slow work because so much has shut down? Well, the people who have been laid off would love to solve those problems for a regular paycheck.

Who do you know that is in an entirely different situation than you? What do you think might be challenging for them? Don’t know? Ask. Send them a text or give them a phone call and ask, “what is the most challenging part about this unique time for you? Be honest.” Hopefully, someone will invite you to share the same.

Now, what is the greatest blessing about this time for you? What are you grateful for, that you keep repeating to yourself or out loud? The nature you are surrounded by that allows you to easily go outside each day? The children running through your home filled with laughter? The ability to take care of your kids and teach them school rather than being pulled away to work everyday? The healthy food in your fridge that you can still afford to buy and were able to find at the store? Your musical instrument you have barely picked up this year? An online community that is meeting via video once per week? Your local yoga studio offering online classes? Your already instilled daily meditation practice? Your dog?

Same as above. Think about those that you love and miss. Ask them what their greatest blessing is during this time. We need to focus on the tiny seemingly insignificant moments that bring us joy. I believe that is one of the reasons we are going through this unique time. Yes hindsight is 20/20, but let’s try not to miss those moments as they are happening right now.

When my mom was sick and battling stage four lung cancer while I was her caregiver, I desperately wanted to take her camping, to Italy, and to the Grand Canyon, to be in the places we always talked about doing the things we always wanted to do together. Yet, these were not options available to us given her quickly deteriorating condition. It was difficult to let go of, but dreams of flights across the globe changed to dreams of a drive down a beautiful road nearby. And since even that was a challenge most days, just watching a good movie together was the new adventure. Yes, seeing Aerosmith and the Rolling Stones live together, and that week we spent in Hawaii just the two of us, are replayed in my mind over and over again and was the best money I ever spent. Also, the smallest moments from the time she was sick are also played over and over again. A moan of tasty satisfaction while she was enjoying the salmon I cooked. Walking with linked arms, if only for five minutes, at our favorite park. Or listening to good music on the drive to doctor’s appointments that reminded us both that we can enjoy good music together wherever we are.

Yes, there may be places you want to go and people you want to see right now, but what we need to focus on is the beauty that is right in front of us. Don’t miss it, because before you know it, we will be back to our crazy fast paced world focused on a culture of busy-ness, success, and material possessions. Right now, pay attention to how happy the world is to slow down, and read the books that have been stacking on the nightstand. Notice the companies who are slashing prices, donating to non-profits, paying their employees while not working, and are putting their energy into helping other small businesses. Look around the four walls you are within, and see what you actually use and need, what others might need that you can donate, and what items you really wish you had.

This is a time to pay attention.

This is a time to put yourself in someone else’s house slippers and robe, and ask what their challenges and blessings are. This is the time to enjoy the tiny seemingly insignificant moments. This is a period to pick up on new values and hold onto them, carrying them back into your everyday life when things begin to go back to “normal.” And what is normal, anyway?

Need some activity ideas on how to be actively empathetic?

• Send postcards with photos of beautiful places you’ve been, or your smiling goofy face, to people you love, using the Touchnote App. I’ve been using it for many years to send postcards to loved ones while I travel the world. You get a discount with the link above, and they are also currently running a sale.
• Tired of texting? Want to hear a friend’s voice but you two have very different schedules and it is hard to schedule time on the phone or for a video call? Download WhatsApp – its a great way to send recorded voice messages to one another throughout the day. I do this with four to five friends around the world regularly.
• Think of a friend who is in a different situation than you. Have they posted any videos, written articles, or shared anything from their community that you could watch or read to understand their situation better, or simply show them love and support? Clicking a “like” button is one thing, but taking 10 minutes to an hour of this time right now to give to a friend is incredibly powerful. What can you actively do to understand a friend’s world better?
  • Ex. My best friend and sister, Ashley Iverson, of The Iverson Foundation for Active Awareness hosted a zoom event, that had more than 100 attendees, to discuss how first responder families can get through this time together. I missed the live event, but watched the full recording, have shared it in multiple places, and told her directly that I watched it and I am proud of her. I understand her world better now.